Of course, it was delayed even longer by the fact that after the defense, I didn't feel like doing much of anything. Even the plans for all the fun things I was going to do post-defense fell by the wayside--I did not have a baking spree--though I did make some truly sublime lemon pound cake--I did not initiate a whole new lifestyle in which I party every night, or at least, go out and talk to people socially on a daily basis. In fact, for the first week post-defense, I spent a lot of time sleeping, and enjoying the lack of compulsion to get up and immediately jump into work. I schmoozed....I lazed...I watched a lot of bad t.v. and re-read Harry Potter Book 7 at least a couple more times and cried when Dobby dies and when Harry gets to see Snape's memories and we learn that he IS good (to all questioners of my unbreakable faith on this point: I freaking TOLD you so). I thought about practicing cake-decorating techniques--which I still want to do--but didn't. I walked around Bflo and fantasized about stuff I'd like to buy someday when I have a real, live, truly salaried job. And enjoyed the fact that I could do all of these things guilt-free.
Also, the day of the defense, I made sure I was very spoily. (Note: the term "spoily" comes from my days as a recent college graduate, when I was living with a friend named Brooke. If I am remembering correctly, we were both having crap-ass days, and declared that from heretoforth, the crap-ass day, and all subsequent crap-ass days--were to be reappropriated as "spoily" days--essentially, a day where you got to do whatever you wanted to make yourself feel good, and essentially spoiled yourself silly. This might have resulted in copious retail therapy, or eating copious amounts of bad-for-you food, or watching a marathon of John Hughes 80s movies...whatever floated your boat, and I have to say they were invariably therapeutic and self-affirming.) Anyway, before the defense, I made sure I went to the good sushi place, and got a takeout combo of a California roll, a tuna roll, and a yellowtail role, and it was damn enjoyable. Then after the defense, I went to Premier Foods & Liquor, or Liquor and Foods, or whatever it's actually called--bought myself a lambec--a delectable, Belgian-style beer that is surprisingly sweet and fruity, as well as a piece of lemon-coconut cake, and went home and watched something fluffy and mindless on tv. And I even took a picture of my cake to commemorate this special moment of indulgence:
Isn't it delectable? I must confess I'm a sucker for some good lemon cake. Something, I guess, that is all the more apparent in my earlier mention of making lemon pound cake in the intentioned baking-spree that wasn't.
Oh, and also, I took a picture of the signed "M" form--a gloriously bureacratic, general form by which degrees are applied for. I haven't sent it in yet, because I'd like my sending it in to coincide with my online dissertation submission, and as you probably gathered, I haven't done much on that front yet, but I felt documenting the form was an important part of affirming and celebrating the defense. So here that is:
It's been almost a month now since the defense, however; a new academic semester has started, and very slowly, I am trying to get back to a mode of being in which I get stuff done. I have just begun reading through my chief advisor's comments on the diss, looking at the summary comments, and re-reading the introduction. Admittedly, this is a very "toe-in-the-water" approach, and I really ought to be diving in so that I can make the necessary (and hopefully minor) revisions/reformatting, but truthfully, it's a doozy to make myself read it again, let alone start messing with it, however little messing there is to be done. So instead, I'm re-reading some other academic stuff totally unrelated to dissertation, but that I'm hoping to turn into an abstract to submit to a conference, and I'm starting to review job market materials from last year and to update them for this year, because that's actually a relatively mindless, and fairly easy, but still necessary activity, though there are some things that really need to be thought about in more depth--like my prospective syllabi. Must do that. Those syllabi. And truthfully, designing syllabi can be fun. Though it is easier to rethink syllabi that you've actually taught already. Ah well...
In any case, thank god the semester has started, as its momentum tends to drag me along, and at the moment, I need to be dragged a bit. But thankfully, there have been some social events scattered here and there. My friend Kate and I drank too much sangria a couple of weeks ago following a perusal of the Elmwood art festival...well it really wasn't too bad, given that we did so over 6-7 hours. But I admit I suprised myself. And technically, I'm not sure it really was sangria--since it combined champagne with Ciao Bella's blackberry-cabernet sorbet, plus the requisite fruit, marinated in triple sec--but it certainly tasted like sangria, and it was quite enjoyable on a sunny, warm afternoon.
Also, Leslie and I finally went out this past weekend--after months of not seeing each other socially--for Indian food, and dessert, and an exchange of birthday/surprise post-defense gifts--Leslie made me an awesome totebag (hopefully to be pictured soon), crafting genius that she is!!--coupled with a quick stop at the mall, where I bought a pair of much-needed new jeans, and considered buying a pair of cream-colored slingback heels with little bows on the toes to go with the adorable, flowery, and uncharacteristically girly dress I found at Marshalls a week or so ago for $20. You've got to love Marshalls for that sort of thing. Granted, they've got plenty of really tacky, cheap crap, but every so often--if you're lucky, and patient, and have no expectations, you can find little gems. Here's the dress by the way (currently strapless, though I hope to create straps for it, so as to feel more secure in wearing it), suitable for a hypothetical garden party, dressy get-together, girls night out, or afternoon spring/summer wedding:
Note: I've been going through quite a girly phase these days...hence, the cute floral dress, and the prospect of the sling-back shoes with bows on the toes, which tragically, didn't quite fit (Leslie noted that I was "clomping" around a bit--they weren't falling off but the slingback was not quite secure around my heel). I don't know what it's about--maybe just feeling like now that the dissertation is more or less over, I can start looking more attractive, and perhaps even do some head-turning, or just feel young and fresh and pretty, and still with the majority of my future in front of me.
But we have just finished Labor Day weekend, which means back to school officially, and which means I officially need to get my ass in gear. "Sure," you say. "Good luck with that," you say. "Whatever," you say. But just you wait. The pull of the semester and the academic job market is strong, and I am sure that my obsessive-compulsive tendencies will shortly take over and riddle me with adrenaline, anxiety, and the ever-tantalizing hope of a better life and then I'll be on my way! Woohoo!
On a side note, here is a picture of Maya and Lyric on Labor Day, which is fairly representative of me on Labor Day as well:
They just make life look so easy, don't they? Until next time, when life may be going a whole helluva lot faster.
